Day 12: Stubborn Submission
Is your perspective of marriage like this...
God didn't create Adam and Eve at the same time and then tell them to work out some compromise on how they would each achieve their personal goals in a cooperative endeavor. He created Adam, gave him an occupation, appointed him to ruler of the planet, endowed him with a spiritual outlook, gave him commands, and specified his duties. Adam commenced his rule of the plant before God created Eve to help him in his life's goals. Adam didn't need to get Eve's consent. God gave her to Adam to be HIS helper, not his partner. She was designed to serve, not to be served, to assist, not to veto his decisions. ~ Debbie Pearl
Head: I have to admit, my perspective is quite different and from this point of view, quite selfish on my part actually. As much as I don't want to admit that this is correct, it is. It simply is exactly what God intended. How can we ever walk through life and be the wife God intended unless we start trying to take this to heart and pray about what God have us do as wives? I am the first to say that I have asked my husband to "help" me many, many times and usually the result is that he is too busy, too tired, or too overworked. However, he does help me when he can.
Have you ever noticed that in the Bible, God does not instruct the wife to love the husband, ever! But that he instructs the husband to love the wife.
Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her, Ephesians 5: 25
Husbands, love your wives, and do not be harsh with them. Colossians 3:19
However, let each one of you love his wife as himself, and let the wife see that she respects her husband. Ephesians 5:33
In the same way husbands should love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. Ephesians 5:28You know what this means? It is in our nature to love our husbands but the opposite is true for them. To love us, they have to be reminded and told to love us, it is not innate. By loving us, they are submitting to God's instruction and are rewarded greatly. However, what God's Word does say for us to do is this...
To the woman he said, “I will surely multiply your pain in childbearing; in pain you shall bring forth children. Your desire shall be for your husband, and he shall rule over you.” Genesis 3:16
Wives, submit to your own husbands, as to the Lord. Ephesians 5:22
Likewise, wives, be subject to your own husbands, so that even if some do not obey the word, they may be won without a word by the conduct of their wives... 1 Peter 3:1
Wives, submit to your husbands, as is fitting in the Lord. Colossians 3:18
For the husband is the head of the wife even as Christ is the head of the church, his body, and is himself its Savior. Ephesians 5: 23
Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit in everything to their husbands. Ephesians 5:24
For this is how the holy women who hoped in God used to adorn themselves, by submitting to their own husbands, 1 Peter 3:5
To be self-controlled, pure, working at home, kind, and submissive to their own husbands, that the word of God may not be reviled. Titus 2:5
For a man ought not to cover his head, since he is the image and glory of God, but woman is the glory of man. 1 Corinthians 11:7
But I want you to understand that the head of every man is Christ, the head of a wife is her husband, and the head of Christ is God. 1 Corinthians 11:3I could go on and on listing God's instruction for us. It starts getting a little redundant but that just goes to show us the importance of helping our men, be the men God intended them to be. If God only had to tell man a few times that they are to love their wives but tell the wives over and over to submit to their husbands, it must mean we are pretty stubborn when it comes to submission.
Heart: As women we may not be able to juggle all the responsibilities we have at home sometimes. However, our husbands should not have to worry about our our responsibilities. They should know that no matter what their decisions are that will change our lives or our future, we will ultimately support our husbands. We can give our opinions and thoughts and our husbands will weigh those as well. They should trust us and us, them. We can not forget that our husbands need to be reminded that we love them and in turn they love us back. We become frustrated in our marriage when we start to assume the opposite...if he'd just love you, you'd love him back. Now, that's just asking for trouble.
Let God speak to you about the wife he intends you to be. God wants you to be happy, he wants you to have the desires of your heart and he wants your marriage to be one of honor. I also encourage you to read over Proverbs 31. It's a standard chapter and scripture in the Bible of a Godly woman and one a husband is certainly proud of. Our roles in our husbands lives are consistently compared to the role of Christ's church. I try to imagine the role of the church when it is submissive to Jesus. Doing so, puts into perspective God's plans for me.
Todays Challenge: Today to something extra or out of the ordinary to "help" your husband. It might be as simple as being a friend to talk to or to have his clothes ready for work the next day. Whatever you see fit, set aside a few minutes of your day to do the challenge. You will be demonstrating your love to him for the sheer joy of being his helper in your marriage and it never hurts to tell him..."I love you".