In the last few weeks, I have felt like there is a young lady who I am supposed to pray for daily, constantly. She is finding out that her world is turning upside down, that her body is going through something new, that she doesn't know how to feel about her life expanding. Her heart is heavy and she has decisions to make. I pray that she makes the right ones. I pray that she knows in her heart that there is a family that will love her baby, that she is being prayed for. I pray that God steps in and gives her direction, gives her peace, and makes her heart leap with hope. I pray she obeys Him.
Savings, paying off debt, making room, filling out paper work, praying. Preparing, sharing, and praying are the 3 things that we are doing right now. We are dipping our toes in the water.
For both of us...
It's like standing on the beach. The ocean is SO big and beautiful, the sounds are soothing and the rhythm of the world is at your feet. The sands shift under your weight, it moves around your feet as you step out into the ocean. At first it is warm, it is thrilling, it is magical...then you step a bit further and you see the life beneath the waves that is watching you, that is curious, that keeps its distance. A little further and you find that you begin to feel weightless and less in control, that you can sink your body under the service, still touching the bottom and still able to breathe. You may or may not be able to see the ocean floor and the waves could be pounding you but you know, if you can just get past the waves that there is a rolling peace in the deep...you just have to tread. So while the treading seems easy at first and the waves are behind you, the billowing of the oceans lifts and drops you up and down. Out in the deeper waters it can get so deep you can't even imagine how far down it goes. The danger rises and your faith shakes. You want to turn back but at some point you are too far out. Even your calls for help can't be heard...but they are heard. Because in the deep is where you find Jesus. In the deep is where you want to be.
When you turn and look at the shore, it is beautiful. You realize you've been building sandcastles all these years. Staying where it's warm and safe. You have looked out over the ocean and marveled at it's vastness. You continued to enjoy riding the waves and building your sandcastles. Aren't they beautiful? But where'd they go? Time, rain, waves, storms, wash them all away.
Moving your feet can sometimes be the hardest part. Taking that first step is most important because it is so new and your don't know what to expect. I have to stop building sandcastles and dreaming, and put my eyes on the deep. Today, I sat down and went over some of the paper work and emails I have received concerning moving forward with finding our daughter. Decisions have to be made concerning all the paper work and which steps to take next but what I found is that God is giving direction.
As we move forward we are going to witness the devil and his evil spirits come under attack. The last thing he wants is for us to raise up a daughter of His, a princess in His kingdom. We will pray daily, call on His name, ask others to pray, and have faith in Him. There is a Bible story about King Asa of Judah, he did what was good and right with the Lord. He removed the foreign alters and smashed anything that was dishonoring to God. He brought peace to Judah and the Lord gave Him rest. When it was time for battle, he called on God for help.
"Lord, there is no one like you to help the powerless against the mighty." 2 Chronicles 14:11
God helps the powerless. Powerless is exactly how I know I will feel at some point. In the mean time, I have decisions to make regarding our home and family. We have to get ready so that we move forward in peace and when the time comes, when the devil attacks, we can rely on Him.
...we will find Him in the deep!