Do you ever have days...
like these? Where you feel pretty, pulled together in a stylish way, like SJP? I do, some days. Not enough though. I'm sure that SJP doesn't get her hair done by a professional stylist that comes to her home though, I"m sure she still has to go to a salon. I on the other had have my own personal stylist. Oh, so lucky me!
My sister-in-law does a fabulous job, it's like I'm in heaven! To only have more days to feel like this. To feel like the mom who can put on a pretty outfit, load the dishwasher and fold the clothes in designer shoes and be able to breath in designer jeans. Ah, to have a fresh face applied first thing in the morning right after the very best Starbucks has to offer.
Or do you have days like these?
I do apologize, this one is a little scary. May be too extreme for some I'm sure but, seriously, do you have days like this? I totally went crazy tonight! First my kids destroyed my house while I was so graciously working on their Christmas gifts. But in hind sight, makes me wonder if they truly deserve them in the first place.
Ya, they do! They're my babies.
This is one of the cases where I should hide in the close tonight and blog. I should get down and dirty and spill my guts and tell all you blessed people that I'm not perfect. I'm not "super mom" as a friend so randomly pointed out to me that I am, over the weekend. To which I responded...I'm not super mom, no one is. Not even the Virgin Mary. (God help me.)
So, I'm just wondering if any man big or small that lives in my house even notices my dismay, my frustration, my desire to be something more than a wife with dirty hair pulled in a pony tail, shorts that are too thin for my liking and no bra with an over sized t-shirt that makes me want to go "MOOOOO" and I can hear my mother-in-law in my mind saying..."She's really let herself go!" Well, today maybe ,but I did clean up for church yesterday and I might decide to shower before I actually lay down tonight.
But, I must say I do have clean sheets on my bed and a freshly flipped mattress thanks to my 4 year old who peed in my bed while taking a nap. My freshly repaired ceiling in the kitchen was not ruined again by water tonight because I made it to my bathtub just in time with an arm load of towels to mop up the so generously splashed water from the bubble bath by candle light my kids were having. (Yes, bubble bath by candle light means = I did try to have a peaceful evening).
So I'm wondering if that mom on Desperate Housewives had the right idea...you know what I'm talking about, right?
Anyway, I don't know what to do about tomorrow but I do know one thing. I've said my prayers. All the way too and from Target tonight to get pull-ups because we were out, I prayed. I prayed that God help me be the mother the He wants me to be, which is the mother that I so desperately want to be. I want Him to set my priorities straight and to not lose my mind ever again. It hurt to bad to feel my heart beat as hard as it did. I haven't cried like that in ages. Probably since I was a little girl. I don't know what is happening to me. I know why, but not what.
So, do you ever?